Becoming a Donor

As I mentioned in my last post, we are now pregnant through IVF.  My sis-in-law also ended up doing IVF too (same clinic, same dr.)

When we started our cycles, we were a month behind.  Due to different protocols, we ended up having our transfers just 5 days apart.

She is now 12 weeks pregnant with twins!  She has 5 frozen embryos remaining.

And she's going to do embryo adoption - through NEDC (!)

When I asked her about her selfless act, this is what she wrote:


Honestly, I haven't really thought about it that much. It was never really a decision that we needed to think about or talk about, it's just the only option that was even on the table for us. A no-brainer. We're not going to keep them frozen forever, and we're definitely not going to destroy them. It sounds weird to say we're not going to "need" them after the twins are born... all life is "needed". But the truth is, our family will be complete. Our five embryos deserve a chance at life regardless of our decision not to have more children. Travis and I were just talking last night about how they aren't ours anyway, and they never were. We're all children of God's and He alone creates life. He created life for those five babies and He has a plan for them. It's our responsibly to foster those little lives, whether that's in our family or someone else's.  NEDC brought my niece into our family, and I trust them to place our five with an equally loving family.

I told our donor about my sis-in-law's choice and she was so impressed at how quickly she came to the decision.  Our donors waited 10 years after the birth of their children before starting the embryo adoption process.  I think everyone just has their own journey through a process like this.

My sis-in-law has started the paperwork with NEDC, but probably won't ship the embryos until after the twins arrive.  She wants to do an open adoption, but with minimal interaction.  She wants to be there for the family if they have questions, but otherwise doesn't want regular updates.

I am so proud of my sis and bro-in-law for making this very sacrificial gift to a family that may otherwise not get the chance to experience pregnancy.