Sienna's dedication

On Sunday, January 15, we dedicated Sienna at our church.  What this means is that we made a commitment

to grow her up in a Christian family, knowing and loving the Lord.  

My grandmother insisted on buying her dedication dress, and because we were dedicating her to God, we thought the more gaudy the dress, the better.  She was a pink poof ball.  I loved it. 

On our way to church, I tried to explain to Brae what it meant that we were dedicating Sienna to God.  

Me: "God gave Sienna to us as a gift, and today, we are going to give her back to God." 

Brae: (Long pause).  "Mommy, I want to go golfing." 

Good talk, Russ.

Unfortunately, none of the professional pictures turned out that great, due to lighting, so the only shots that we really got were from my sister's camera (below). 

O

 Some other Sienna highlights: 

-- Girl weighs over 20 lbs.  She's in 12-18 month, oh heck, yes some 2T clothes.  

-- She has 7 teeth, and the 8th is bulging.  

-- She just (like this morning) learned how to get into a sitting position from lying down.  She also just recently learned how to get from sitting to lying down.  She's rolling, rolling, rolling.  She gets on all 4's and rocks back and forth, and kind of crawls backward, but no forward motion yet. 

-- She's eating solids (pureed), but no real solids yet.  She can't seem to yet figure out how to move the food from the front of her tongue to the back.  So when I've tried to feed her solids, she tends to gag and puke up what she's just eaten.  

-- Still the only person who can get her to belly laugh is her brother.  Which is odd, because he likely poses the greatest threat to her safety.  But, all he has to do is walk in the room, and she just lights up like a Christmas tree.  She adores him.

Brae.  Sigh.  That boy.  I know most parents say this, but our son really is very intelligent.  He's working on spelling out words when we read, he can count up to 50 (well, he could really go up to 100, but who has the time for that? ha ha!), and he can play Jedi Mind Control games on you.

A couple recent moments of fun: 

The other day, Brae was downstairs going potty.  (He has a different potty in the house that he prefers for different times of the day.  The morning pee pee is downstairs).  Anyway, I'm standing next to him, and he points to a small brown spot on the bathroom rug.  "Mommy, that's my poop," he says.  "Huh? Your poop?"  "Yes, some of my poop fell there the other day."  "Oh, okay," I say, "Thanks, I'll put it in the washing machine."  "Yeah, but Mommy, don't touch it.  It's icky.  It's for the dogs."  

(Apparently he remembers that both of our dogs fondly liked eating the others' poop.  Yummy.) 

We went to the doctor's on Friday.  We were in the waiting room.  They had a water cooler.  Brae filled up a Dixie cup of water and proclaimed to the waiting room: "I am going to drink this water like a dog."  And then he placed the Dixie cup in the middle of the room, got on all fours, and lapped up the water like a dog.  

A proud moment for me as a mother.

Last night, for the first time ever, I became a prop in one of Brae's imaginations.  I was sitting in Sienna's room, watching her roll on the floor.  Brae declared to me that he was going to cut my hair.  So, he took blanket after blanket after blanket and draped them around me, around my neck, trying to tie them in the back, and preparing to cut my hair.  And then he got the eraser from the chalkboard and pretended to shave my head.  

Love.

We're sending her the proof.

Sienna was dedicated at our church this last Sunday (I will post about that awesome dedication next week).  But the event got me to thinking about Brae's dedication when he was just shy of 3 months old. 

It was January 2009.  It was Sanctity of Life Sunday.  Our church asked us to give our testimony about Brae's adoption. 

As I was speaking before the hundreds of people in the congregation, I got to the place in the story when Rachael (Brae's birthmom) and I talked about her decision to not abort. 

Brae was a mere several hours old.  It was Halloween night.  Rachael and I were in her hospital room.  It was late and it was dark.  Brae was asleep.  Rachael was in the bed, and I was on the couch beside her.  We'd just finished a long, wonderful conversation about her life and dreams.  Then, the conversation turned to when she found out she was pregnant, and what decision she was going to make.  She and her longtime boyfriend were having problems and she did not think they would stay together. 

Me: "Did you think about abortion?"
Rachael: "Yes."
Me: "And what did you think about?"
Rachael: "I decided that I was not going to abort this child because it was not the baby's fault.  Getting pregnant was not the baby's fault.  I was not going to punish this baby for something I did.  That's when I decided that God had placed this baby in me as a gift for someone else.  I was merely the vessel."

I told her that she had had 3 options, and she chose the most unselfish.  She could have aborted him, and he wouldn't be here.  She could have said, "I'm going to keep him because he's 'mine,' no matter what his life may look like.  But, she did the most loving -- she carried him for 9 months, gave birth to him, and said "I love you so much, I want a better life for you." 

As I was sharing the testimony, Tygh was holding Brae up on stage.  Then, all of a sudden, when I got to this part of the testimony about Rachael choosing life for our son, Brae got the BIGGEST smile on his face.  The crowd erupted with laughter and tears. 

So, on Sunday, as we were driving to church to dedicate Sienna, I thought back on this story.  And I decided to text Rachael:

Me: "I don't think I ever told you about Brae's dedication.  When I was giving our testimony and got to the part where you told me you were going to choose life for Brae and not abort him, Brae got the biggest smile on his face. We have it on video."
Rachael: "I'd love to see it."
Me: "Ok.  I will send you a copy."

 I have a copy of Brae's dedication and I'm going to send it to her.

She will see living proof that, even as an infant, Brae was ecstatic that his birthmom chose life for him. 

You be the Judge.

A series of coincidences, or something more?

I have a very good friend, whose privacy I have agreed to maintain, but we'll call her Zoe.

Zoe has been trying to get pregnant for many years, and a couple years ago, adopted a son.  She and her husband have gone through many rounds of fertility treatment, unsuccessfully.

Recently, Zoe and I made an informal pact to step up our quiet times in the morning, reading the Bible, and sharing what we're learning with each other.  A couple of weeks ago, we decided to earnestly be praying that we would each spontaneously get pregnant.  (You heard that right -- Tygh and I are open to a 3rd child, but only if it happens spontaneously).

 We each know the medical diagnoses we've received, so that if we did get pregnant spontaneously, it would be no small miracle.  And, because we believe it's important to pray specific prayers so you receive specific answers, we've each boldly and with great faith and expectation have begun praying to spontaneously get pregnant this year.

A couple days ago, Zoe and her husband were wrestling with whether to do another round of fertility treatment.  Yesterday, I was flipping through Facebook, and found this verse on a friend's page: "The Lord will fight for you.  You just need to be still."  Exodus 14:14.  (Other interpretations are "You need to stay calm" and "You need to hold your peace").

I texted this verse to Zoe.  Immediately, she wrote back that was the confirmation she needed.  She and her husband decided that they would not do any more fertility treatment, but instead "be still" and fervent in prayer that God would indeed bless them with a spontaneous pregnancy. 

For many months, she and her husband have believed that God would bless them with a pregnancy, with a daughter, and that they were to name her "Abby".  (Does any of this sound familiar?!)  "Abby" was one of their son's first words, and lately, Zoe has been seeing that name EVERYWHERE. 

Zoe and I emailed most of yesterday.  During one of the emails,  I told her I had this very strong "picture/vision" in my head.  It was of a forest.  I was looking at a forest full of trees, and yet could see this very bright, multi-colored light behind the trees.  The light was moving.  I told Zoe I felt very strongly that this "picture/vision" was from God and that He was using it to tell us that even in the midst of the forests of our lives (infertility), He IS moving.  He IS working.  He's already in the forest, working on our behalf.

Last night, as I was driving home, I texted Zoe, "So what does Abby mean, anyway?"

Zoe: "It means 'Joy of the Father'".

When I received that text, my heart stopped.  I almost couldn't breathe. 

I texted back, "You know that Bible verse I sent you this morning?  You know how I told you I saw it on a friend's Facebook page?  Do you know which friend it was? It was my friend Joy's page."

(I still get chills).

And, then, this morning, Zoe sent me an email with this picture, below.  "Look what randomly popped up on Pinterest last night.  It's your vision".

Again, full. body. chills.

A series of coincidences?

I think not.

A very special video

Over Christmas, my sister-in-law (thank you!) made the most amazing video about Sienna's journey to us.  Warning: you may cry.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-B3eTh1Pgk8

The lyrics of the first song are most poignant (from Norah Jones, "Seven Years"):

"Spinning, laughing, dancing to
Her favorite song
A little girl with nothing wrong
Is all alone

Eyes wide open
Always hoping for the sun
And she'll sing her song to anyone
That comes along

Fragile as a leaf in autumn
Just fallin' to the ground
Without a sound

Crooked little smile on her face
Tells a tale of grace
That's all her own

Fragile as a leaf in autumn
Just fallin' to the ground
Without a sound

Spinning, laughing, dancing to her favorite song
She's a little girl with nothing wrong
And she's all alone"

She's alone no more!

The weekend in review

-- Sienna's top toofers are coming in -- one has broken through (the girl now as 3! At 6 months!).  Their arrival has not been nearly as easy as her bottom toofers, and suffice it to say I have not had a lot of sleep the last several nights.

-- Sienna is sitting up like a champ.  Her neck is still getting better, and the PT has now released us from any more appointments.  It's been a long 4 months of sometimes 3 doctor appointments a week.  We will continue to go to the chiro appointments, but I'm hoping those will taper off, too.

-- We went to the family cabin in the mountain for the long NYE weekend with Tygh's sister and her husband and their 19-month-old son, who is Brae's cousin brother.  He is also adopted, and Brae adores him.  It was so great to get away with some family and ring in the new year together (even if we were in bed the second after midnight).

-- Here are some fun pics through the eyes of Americana: public sledding down a random hill off the highway = mass chaos.  I alone witnessed three separate incidences that probably all require some kind of medical treatment. 

 

Last week, Brae also attended his first professional basketball game with Tygh.  Tygh's company has courtside seats, so he took Tygh and a friend of Tygh's and his 5-year-old son.  It was a complete blast that Brae is still talking about (and wearing his jersey to bed each night).  If you know my son, he LOVES basketball.  It didn't get much better than this: 

Christmas by bullets, love from afar, and a Brae-ism

-- As the product of divorce, we travel all over God's green earth celebrating Christmas.  This year was no exception.  Four Christmases this year = lots of booty for the kiddos.

-- Yet, in it all, we kept reminding Brae that Christmas is Jesus' birthday.  Because Jesus is so special, we get to celebrate His birthday over a period of 4 days.  And the reason we give each other gifts on Christmas is because the 3 wise men brought presents when Jesus was born.  Giving gifts to each other is a way to celebrate the birth of Jesus.

-- Brae must have sang "Happy birthday" to Jesus about 10 times over the long weekend.  When I would ask him how old Jesus is, he replied, "Jesus is 2." 


--  When Brae woke up Christmas morning, he immediately started heading downstairs.  I had to yell, "WAIT! Don't go downstairs yet!", as I quickly finished getting dressed, raced downstairs after him, in search of the video camera.  "Don't come down, Brae! Mommy has to get the video camera!"  At that point, Brae was on the bottom step, but had not yet turned to see the tree or presents.  I jumped over him, and darted toward the camera.  Huffing and puffing, I turned it on, and said, "Okay, now you can come downstairs."  Brae smiled.  Then he gleefully climbed all the way back up the stairs and started s.l.o.w.l.y coming down the stairs again.  Cute kid -- he thought the big excitement was him climbing down the stairs.  ha ha!  When he did turn the corner on the last step, and saw all the presents that were not there the night before, he stopped dead in his tracks and his mouth fell to the floor.

-- Brae's birthfamily mailed to the agency a TON of gifts for him that I then picked up.  We feel so blessed that his birthfamily has sent gifts to him each year, and a card with all their signatures saying how much they love him.

-- Sienna's genetic family also sent her a TON of gifts that were so special to us and meant so much.  The best, by far, was a recordable storybook about Frosty the Snowman.  The first page of the book opens with them all wishing her a first merry Christmas with her family.  They say how much they love her and think of her and how they hope to meet her one day.  I still have yet to read the entire book, because I can't stop crying long enough to turn the first page.  We are so blessed to have extended families that love our kiddos so much.

-- Brae-ism: We are practicing putting on underwear the correct way.  The other day, I must have told Brae three different times that the flap in the front indicates the front of his underwear, and that the solid part in the back indicates the back of his underwear.  Yet, each time, he kept putting the underwear on backwards.  Finally, sensing my frustration, he pulled off his underwear, held it out in front of him, stuck his head inside it, looked around, and then pulled his head out.  "Mom," he said, "there's no map in there."  And then he walked away, naked.

Warning: You will cry.

Adoption changes lives.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iexJtB57bkY&feature=share

A post of (more) pics

Sienna's 6 month stats (and more Brae stories)

Sienna's 6 month stats:

-- She is 27 3/4 inches (98th percentile).  She is actually 3/4 of an inch longer than Brae at this same age.
-- She weights 18 lbs, 11.5 ounces (90th percentile).  She is 2 pounds heavier than Brae at this same age. 
-- Her head is 17 inches circumference.  That is the 76th percentile.

All in all, a well-proportioned girl.  She has been in 12-18 month clothes.... for a while. 

She is sitting on her own for periods of time.  And she rolls, rolls, rolls.

Dr. said her eyes will probably stay the color they are (sky blue).  We are in trouble. ; )

She's starting to get a little more hair.  It's strawberry blond. 

We received a Christmas card from our donors, and their children's 3rd grade pictures.  The resemblance between Sienna and her genetic sister is ASTOUNDING.  If Sienna ends up looking anything like her, she is going to be a beauty (of course, we believe she already is). 

Her torticollis has greatly improved.  The PT thinks she may only need one more appointment.  She still likely has several more chiro appointments in her future, however. 

Brae stories:

-- We had a visit from Roto-Rooter the other night.  Brae stuffed an entire roll of ultra-thick Charmin toilet paper down the toilet.  That ended up being a $150 dollar lesson.

-- Brae only needs about 10-11 hours of sleep, total, in a 24-hour period.  He takes a 2-hour nap at his school.  Which means he only needs 8-9 hours at night. Which means he often likes to play in his room until about 9-10 p.m. at night (much to our chagrin).  Which also means that Mommy and Daddy are in bed before he is (!).  Sometimes, this poses a problem. Case in point -- it was 9:30 last night and Tygh and I had just climbed into bed.  We had heard Brae talking to his imaginary schoolmates in his room.  Then, about 10 minutes later, I hear Brae open his door.  Silence.  Silence for the next 5 minutes. 

More silence. 

Then, I hear a loud "HOLA!" from Flicker, his Handy Manny flashlight.  Brae is pointing Flicker right in my face, and has turned on the light right in my eyes. 

Me: "Brae, what are you doing?
Brae: "Mommy, I came to say good night and I needed a flashlight to come and find you."

Sigh.  How can I ever get upset with this boy?

Pictures galore!

Brae-isms Part....?? .... who knows... there has been a lot

-- 'Tis the season to teach my son about giving.  Sure, I try to do it year-round, but this time of year provides a wealth of opportunities.  I really wanted to do something very impactful, like serve at a soup kitchen, but I have to remind myself he's only 3 years old, and what really can he comprehend?  So, my work participates in the community food drives, so I thought that would be a perfect opportunity.  Last night, I sat Brae down and the conversation went something like this:

  Me: "Brae, you know when you are hungry, Mommy and Daddy give you food?"
  Brae: (nods)
  Me: "Well, did you know that there are some people that don't have any food? So, when they are hungry, they   don't have any food to eat."
  Brae: (eyes get very wide).  "No food to eat?"
  Me: "That's right.  Would you like to fill a box with some food and give it to the people who don't have any food to eat?"
  Brae: (eyes widen again) "Yes!"

So, for the next ten minutes, we filled up a box with food from our pantry, and I tried to explain to Brae that they would not want his half-eaten boxes of raisins.

-- Brae is Mr. Entertainer.  He loves to make people laugh.  Case in point -- were playing t-ball in the living room last night, and after he  hit the ball, he'd chase after it, carrying his bat.  Well, he tripped over his bat and totally bit it on the floor.  He just started laughing hysterically.  Then, he saw me laughing.  Well, that was way too much for him to handle -- he loved doing that.  So, for the next half an hour, he'd chase after the ball again, and then pretend to totally bite it on the floor again, and again, and again.  He just wanted to make his Mommy laugh. 

-- Brae: "Mommy, why does the moon follow us home every night?"
    Me: "Ummmmmm......"

Blessed by infertility.

We celebrated our 6-year wedding anniversary this last weekend.  Six years of joyfully bumpy wedded bliss.  By far, our biggest marital "struggle" has been infertility.  When we got married, we had no idea that we would be blessed with at least one confirmed miscarriage and years of infertility.

That's right, I said blessed. 

I say blessed because without infertility, we would not have experienced the joy of adoption.  If you have never experienced domestic adoption, and been on that wild ride, you cannot relate to the whirlwind journey.  It is a ride.  It is thrilling, exhilarating, desperate, painful, anxious, nervous, climactic, a bring-you-to-your-knees encounter to the very core of who you are.  Everything you've ever thought about life and the loss of life (abortion, miscarriage, child neglect) is challenged. 

I say blessed because without infertility, we would not have come face to face with our need for God.  During our struggle, we've never been more angry at, scared of, in awe of, delighted by, and humbled by our Maker.

I say blessed because without infertility, we would never have been given the lens through which you see miracles take place. 

I say blessed because without infertility, we would never have had so many tears shed, fights, bitter silence, sob-filled hugs, or cling-to-eachother moments. 

I say blessed because without infertility, we would have never taken our journey to NEDC and Tennessee.  We would never have met Jennifer and Dave.  We never would have got to experience the miracle of life, frozen, in a petri dish, thawed, transferred, and given the chance to grow into a beautiful baby girl.

Sure, we could have been blessed by getting pregnant easily, and carrying to term without any complications, and giving birth to beautiful children.

But, then we would not have Brae and Sienna.  The only way for Brae and Sienna to come to be ours was through infertility and adoption. 

And, we wouldn't have it any other way.

Our six years of marriage has brought us incredible blessings.

Witness to a miracle, b-ball, and so proud...

-- This last weekend, I witnessed a miracle.  In Brae's room, there is a large, heavy glass globe covering his ceiling light.  Kind of like this:
Brae and Sienna were rolling around on the floor, beneath the ceiling light.  I was sitting near them, leaning against the closet.  After watching them giggle and play, I decided it was time to get Brae dressed for the football game he was going to.  I pulled Brae away from the center of the room and toward the closet.  And then I swept Sienna up right alongside me so she could watch as I got Brae dressed.

Then... within seconds after swooping the kiddos to my side, this ceiling light crashed to the floor and broke into a thousand pieces.  It broke in the EXACT place that both Sienna and Brae had been seconds before.  It was such a loud sound, we were all shaken.  The glass scattered all throughout the room, except none in our direction. 

Seconds earlier, my son and my daughter were lying on their backs, giggling, staring up at that very light.  I cannot stop replaying the "what-ifs" in my head.

I immediately fell flat on my face in prayer and thanksgiving.

I went to Bible study that night and told what had happened.  One of my favorite remarks was, "Can you imagine what was going on in the spiritual realm right before? That Satan and his demons were chuckling, just waiting for the light to crash on your babies? And yet, God and His angels were not going to let that light crash until you had swept those babies out of the way."

Wow.

-- I've said it before, and I'll say it again.  Brae is a basketball phenomenon.  This last weekend, we went to a birthday party that was held at an indoor arcade place, of sorts.  They had a pop-a-shot basketball game, which we ended up spending all of our tokens on.  Brae played for probably 20 minutes, and by the end, he had gathered a small crowd of onlookers around him, marveling at this little boy, with his stance, jump shot, and swooshing in basket after basket.  I was so proud.

-- And speaking of so proud, my husband just got a huge job promotion at work!  I know how much a man's career means to them and their self-esteem, and I could not be prouder that my husband has put his heart and soul into his job, and it is being recognized and rewarded.

I am thankful and blessed.