What I will miss...

This week, hubby and I are departing on our annual "no kids" vacation. 

It's always a good trip for us, for our marriage.

It's always a really hard trip for me, personally.  It's so hard for me to leave the kiddos behind for so long.  I know they will be in great hands with my parents, and will have an outstanding time, and not miss us for a second, but it's hard for me to function when my heart is left behind.

Here's some recent pictures that will be floating around in my head, and keeping me afloat, until I see them again.

What they say....

 Some things I've heard about a second child:

They can be late bloomers.

They don't talk as early.

They tend to rely on their older sibling to accomplish tasks they could otherwise do for themselves.

I have to say that each of these comments have tended to be true about Little Miss.  Looking back to when Brae was this age, he seemed more articulate and verbal than she is now.   That said, I think Little Miss is talking more Spanish than Brae did at this age, and is intermixing the two languages a little more.

Don't get me wrong.  I'm not at all concerned about Little Miss's development.  In fact, I think she's outsmarting everyone.  Why would you do things for yourself if your older brother will do them for you?  What need is there to talk when all you have to do is give your older brother "the look," and he will get exactly whatever you need?

No doubt about it.  Behind her quiet lips is an active brain at work.  And, she's winning.


PS - I have every intention of taking away this bottle that is in her hand on her 2nd birthday.  Don't judge.    : )

A breakthrough.

Our adoption process through the state is moving slower than molassas.  Uphill.  In the w.i.n.t.e.r.t.i.m.e. 

Each time I've tried to get a hold of our caseworker, it's taken her weeks to respond.  When I call her voicemail, the greeting says, "Hello, this is Alice.  Today is Monday, February 4.  I will be out of the office all week ..."  The greeting has said February 4 for two and a half months. 

When I send her an email, it takes three follow-up emails on my part to get one, two-line response from her.

Don't get me wrong.  I'm not necessarily blaming her.  There are only three caseworkers in our county for all of the adoptions.  Two of those caseworkers only work part-time.  It's part of the economic/budget shortfall. 

But it is beyond frustrating.

My last missive to her was no different.  I just wanted a status update.  No response.

One week later, no response.

Two weeks later, no response.

Finally, this week, the third week, I received a response.  She was transferring our file. 

Turns out, given her overloaded caseload, another caseworker (the one full-time caseworker) agreed to take one file from her.  That file is ours. 

We were overjoyed.  Already, since that transfer, we have had more communication with  our new caseworker than after four months with our old caseworker.

And, just this morning, we received the best news yet: our homestudy is starting in two weeks. (!!!!)

The process will take an average of three months, according to our caseworker.  That means that by at least the end of July/beginning of August, we should finally be on the wait list.

A breakthrough.

Brae-isms

A recent survey showed that, according to the people who took the survey, the "cutest" age of a child is 4.5 years.  Brae is almost that old, and he certainly does not disappoint.  So, with that, here is the next installment of "Brae-isms." 

***

1.  We are in the process of painting our house.  This last weekend, we got some sample paints (a mix of greens/browns), and Brae and I found an inconspicuous corner in the back of the house to try some of the samples.  As we painted swaths on the house, I numbered each swath.  After sample #3, I stepped back and remarked, "Brae, I'm not sure I like #3.  It kind of looks like poop."  Brae grinned.  We kept painting.  After we had painted all 8 sample colors, we stood back again to marvel at our collage.  I sighed, and said, "Brae, you know, I actually think now I like #3.  What do you think?"  Brae looked up at me, startled.  "Mommy?! You like poop?"

***

2. One morning over breakfast, the following conversation ensued (in Spanish):

Yo: "Brae.  Aqui esta algunos Cheerios para desayuno.  Mira, un Cheerio, y un otro Cheerio.  Uno y uno es dos, no?"

Brae: "No, mama! Uno y uno es once!"

(English translation: I asked Brae if one Cheerio and one Cheerio makes two Cheerios.  He informed me that one and one makes eleven, not two.  Clearly, I'm the one in need of a math lesson). 

***

3. One Sunday, on our way home from church, the following conversation ensued in the car:

Brae: "Mommy, I want to go to heaven and see Jesus."

Me: "Okay.  But not right now."

Brae: "But, Mommy! I want to!"

Me: "Brae, did you know you don't need to go to heaven to visit Jesus? Did you know He's all around? He lives in your heart and you can actually talk to him whenever you want."

(Silence).

(More silence.  I look in my rear-view mirror to see Brae in the back seat.)

Brae: (Looking down at his heart).  "Jesus? .... Where's my house?"

***

4.  This last weekend, I was driving with the kids to a playdate.  We stopped at a light.  There was a homeless man on the side of the road, holding a cardboard sign.  He was asking for money.  I rolled down my window and gave him some cash.  We then drove away.  As we turned the corner, Brae said, "Mommy! I want to go home and get my piggy bank so I can come back and give him all of my money."

Resurrection Sunday (Easter) pictures

We live in Oregon.  It is a beautiful, lush, green part of the country.  It is that way mostly because we get rain 6-9 months out of the year. 

But, this weekend was phenomenal.  I saw one temperature reading at 81 degrees on Sunday, which is virtually unheard of for March in the Great Northwest. 

Below are some pictures of the weekend.  Because, really, words can't do justice.  Especially to the series of photos we took trying to get the 4 grandkids in one picture together.

Brae and Sienna-isms

1.  A few weeks ago, I took Brae and Sienna for an impromptu getaway to the beach with my sisters-in-law and mother-in-law.  Brae was so excited to go to the beach and play with his little cousins.  As we were packing up the night before, I asked him what he was most excited about.   He looked at me, wide-eyed, and in a very solemn voice said:

                  "Mommy, I need to go and find Nemo and bring him back home."

    And then he walked away. 

***

2. This last weekend, I was driving to the grocery store with the kids.  Sienna is just starting to talk more and more, but sometimes only I know what she is saying.  As we were pulling up to the store, she points out the window and yells, "Mama!  Da da brrrr!" 

      I smiled and said, "Why, yes, honey, it is a bird!  Good girl!  Brae, did you hear that? Sienna said 'It's a bird!'"

      Brae piped up and said, "No, Mommy, she' didn't.  She said 'Da da brrrr.'"


***

3.  The kids had a day off from school one day, and Tygh and I had to work.  So my dad and stepmom drove up to watch the kids for the day.  My parents divorced when I was relatively young, and my dad re-married when I was about 8.  My stepmom, Cindy, did not have biological children.  It was just me and my younger sister.  Neither of them have much practice in little kids, let alone diapers. 

      As I was giving Cindy a tutorial on how to change Sienna's diaper - and Sienna was being quite a good prop - I told Cindy that, unfortunately, Sienna likes to poop about mid-morning.  I would be at work, so Cindy would have to change her poopy diaper.

      Cindy looked at me, puzzled, and whispered, "So .... what do I do with her after she poops? Do I just stick her in the bathtub or something?"

***

4.   This next story is perhaps one of my proudest moment as Brae's Mommy.  Especially after our whole episode earlier this year with the owners of his play gym calling me about complaints received from other parents about Brae's behavior.

      I took Brae grocery shopping, and we passed by an elderly man (probably in his 90s) in a wheelchair, kind of hunched over, not looking or talking to anyone.  Brae left my side and marched right up to the old man and said (in a rather loud voice): "I like you.  You're my friend.  You can borrow my legs."  And Brae walked away.

      There were tears in my eyes, and in those of bystanders watching. 

They told.

Last week, I got perhaps one of the best text messages ever.

It was from our donors.  They finally told their twins, Sienna's full-blooded siblings, about Sienna. 

Sienna's full-blooded siblings are from the same group of embryos that she is.  They are now 12 years old. 

The twins have known who Sienna is since she was born.  They have sent her gifts on Christmas and on her birthday. But, it wasn't until last week that they finally knew who she is. 

Some have asked why it took our donors so long to tell their kids about Sienna.  Sienna is now nearly 2 years old.  We have an open adoption.

I have never questioned, or passed any judgment, on our donors' decision to wait.  I've always trusted that they would know when the right time was to tell this very important, and somewhat complicated, story about Sienna's origin and what it means to them. 

So, now they know.  And, apparently they are over the moon.  Our donor said that they would hop on a plane now if she let them.

That gave me (and still gives me) the biggest smile.  This is why we did open adoption.  For moments like this.  Obviously, Sienna is too young to know about any of this.  But it's always nice to know (and one day meet) more family and more people who love you.

So, I told our donors that Oregon is beautiful in the summertime.

This is Me.

My boss has started a teambuilding exercise in our department.  She brought in a psychologist who gave us a couple of personality tests and then discussed the results with us.

In a nutshell, this is what the personality tests said I am:

"Warm, sympathetic, and helpful.  Personable, cooperative, and tactful.  Conscientious and loyal; value security, stability, tradition.  Focused on the present; makes decisions based on experience and facts.  Uncomfortable with conflict; work hard to make sure it doesn't occur.  Focused on the needs of others; often uncomfortable with personal analysis.  Usually seen by others as sociable, enthusiastic, energetic, organized and traditional."

So,  yup, that's Me.

That's Me as Wife, Mother, Daughter, Sister, Friend, Co-worker, you name it.

That's Me.

And that is Me (granted, in my high school senior photo - just for fun - gotta love the 90s).

Brae and Sienna-isms

1.  On Martin Luther King Jr. day, Brae didn't have school.  My mom was watching him and Sienna.  It was also the morning of the presidential inauguration.  My mom and Brae were watching it on t.v.  The following dialogue ensued:

Grandma: "Brae, do you know who that is on t.v.?"
Brae: "No.  Who?"
Grandma: "That's the President of the United States.  He's kind of an important guy."
(Long pause)
Brae: "Does that mean you have to ask his permission before you can go to the bathroom?"

***

2.  In yet another presidential moment, last Monday was President's Day.  Again, Brae and Sienna didn't have school.  My sister was watching them.  On their way to the park, this conversation ensued:

Tia (Spanish for Aunt): "Brae, do you know why you don't have school today?"
Brae: "No.  Why?"
Tia: "Because it's President's Day.  Do you know who our President is?"
Brae: "No.  Who?"
Tia: "His name is Barrack Obama.  He is our President.  Now, you remember that, and I'm going to ask you later in the day about this to see if you remember what we talked about."

(Several hours later)

Tia: "Brae, do you remember what day today is?"
(Long pause)
Brae: "It's Obama Day!"

(As an aside, it may not be hard to guess that my mom and sister are both Obama-supporters.  I make no comment or opinion about their judgment).

***

3.  Sienna is starting to speak more, and even string words together.  Her latest word is "sorry."  Except, it sounds like "saw-ee."  Brae thinks it is hilarious when she says it, so he likes to push her buttons to make her slap, hit, kick, spit, or bite him.  Then, he pretends to cry.  Then, like clockwork, she pats him on the head, says "saw-ee" and walks away.

The funniest thing about this is that she shows absolutely no empathy when she's apologizing to him.  Girl cracks me up.

***

4. And the ultimate example of the difference between boys and girls:

We have a life-sized teddy bear that I often use to play with the kids.  The other day, Brae was trying to play kung-fu with the teddy bear at the same time as Sienna was putting a blanket on him and kissing him good-night.


Love these little guys.